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The simple answer is yes. The coaching model and perspective we need to consider is called “Be-Do-Have.” Generally, people believe that if we had something that we wanted, we will be able to do what we like and then only can we be happy. For example, if we had the fancy car, we can drive it and hence be happy, or to be more specific to weight, we think that if we had a slimmer body, we would do the activities and wear the clothes we want and then we will be happy. Consider this subtle change of perspective, where we need to first “be” in order to “do” and then only can we “have”.  In other words, if you want to be slimmer, you need to behave like a thin person does, eat light and exercise daily, and only then can you have that body. 

Being slim or being fat is a lifestyle choice for most of us. Yes there are the blessed ones who can eat what they want and not exercise at all, and perhaps they are genetically predisposed to being thin. They must have done a lot of good deeds in their previous lifetimes. However for the rest of us, we have to choose a lifestyle that allows us to be slim, which means that it is a constant practice. It is not an end point, it is not a goal or a destination, it is a lifetime of living and behaving the way a thin person would.

In any area of my coaching, whether it be to support people into earning more money, growing their investments, attracting the right relationship, or losing weight, I believe that it is very important to emulate other people who have done the same. When you want to amass wealth, you would read Warren Buffet’s strategies and try to copy them. The same goes with having  a lean body. Watch and learn what people with fabulous bodies do, what they eat and how much they exercise. 

I have noticed how complacent people get, they only want to do “so-much”, they don’t want to sacrifice too much of their favourite foods or incorporate a regular exercise regime into their days, they are too busy and have no time. They even say, “I am always traveling” “the week was full of guests and weddings”. Notice that the celebrities whose bodies we covet are partying and travelling much more than we ever could, yet they manage? When I am packing my bags to travel, the first thing that goes in are my sneakers!

In order to be slim, you have to want to live like a slim person, sleep enough, structure in a daily habit of cardio and weight exercise and eat light. It is simple mathematics and it does add up. The one cup of tea with sugar, or 2 glasses of wine, or 3 pieces of chocolate if indulged in every day is going to add up.

Similarly, if you made it a habit to sleep enough, walk briskly for an hour everyday, watch your sugar, carbohydrate and fat intake, ate a lot of fresh vegetables and protein and incorporated some weight training at least three times a week and you committed to this religiously, just as you habitually brush your teeth every day, you will be thin. There is no doubt.

I have seen people being stubborn about how they are eating so healthy and they walk everyday, but still not losing weight. If what you are doing isn’t working, then you have to first change the way you are looking at it and then from the new point of view, change your actions. 

Even Einstein says doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results is a sign of insanity. I think that we get stuck in our lifestyle, for example, watching TV after dinner, taking the lift to our home or office, eating all the rice and rotis we are offered, and then we have tons of low-fat yoghurt, and skim milk and light chips, diet sodas and brown bread, thinking we are being so healthy. To add to it, we go for a walk every evening, which is more of a stroll, then we say, we are fat and just not losing weight, so it must be my genes, or it could be my hormones. You know what? It’s just that you are stubborn about not wanting to try a different way.

Change your lifestyle, list every single activity you do a day and list every single morsel and sip that goes into your body, and do this for 48 hours and see what comes up. Then educate yourself, research 10 different Hollywood or Bollywood stars and just read about what they eat and how much they exercise. How can you even hope to look half as slim as them when you are not willing to change your routine and lifestyle by even 50%?

Like I said, it is all maths!

I am 40 and nearing the hormonal imbalances that take place in our bodies and as “they” say, every decade makes it that much harder to keep weight off as our metabolism slows down. This means, also, that we do not need as much food as we used to, if I wanted to, I could throw in the towel and just give up, but no. I persist. Yes we can all list hundreds of very valid and real reasons and excuses as to why we don’t’ have the body we desire, or we can do the work and have results instead. So would you rather have more reasons or results?

On that note, I am off to hit the treadmill. See you in the next article.

Malti Bhojwani is the founder of Multi Coaching International, a Life Coach, an NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) practitioner, a workshop leader and an author. Her first published work is a Journal to encourage guided writing, Thankfulness, Appreciation, Gratitude – My Journal is available in all good book stores.