Anger is part of everyday life. Subconsciously or consciously, our days are filled with hatred, violence, anger and aggression. Many psychological theories on human development focus on the universatility of an infant’s struggle with primitive fantasies of guilt, aggression, and reparation; these fantasies are said to stem from the core feelings of anger and frustration. Most theories agree that human beings grow up with anger right from the very beginning of their lives.
Anger Theory: Anger Creates False Power
The famous psychoanalyst, Jacues Lacan suggested that anger results from the psychological defense against the intimidation of a disruption in thought. The baseline of his findings was that as infants, we are just a jumble of biological processes. Authority-less and in search of self identity, we live in a perpetual state of fragmented confusion. This lack of identity may further give a feeling of unified personality. In brief, it creates a psychological fuss within us, which hides our essential human vulnerability and weakness. Thus, in order to defend ourselves from the truth of our essential fragmentation, we adopt the most common defense available - anger.
Anger creates a false world where we hide our weaknesses, and feel that we possess power over the situation at hand. In short, it creates a sense of entitlement.
Anger is Becoming a Mental Health Problem in Urban India
Anger management is seldom practised in an Indian scenario. In a country where more basic health concerns rule the roost, mental health plays second fiddle to widespread disease, malnutrition and lack of fitness avenues. However, anger is finding its way into urban India and beginning to affect relationships and social settings.
One of the least celebrated branches of the cognitive therapy tree, anger management is a quasi-scientific way of controlling anger and related negative feelings. Anger affects mental, physical health and relationships at many levels.
A Look At Why Anger Management is Essential
Lack of anger management can be disastrous as it can affect one’s mental health, and can also hamper personal and professional relationships. Anger management is a must for those who are not able to control their temper and let anger affect their lives. Anger management can be a solution of your overall well being. Mentioned below are a few anger management tips, which you must follow in order to manage your anger practically and maximize your physical and mental wellness.
- Don’t try to be perfect. Expect others to perform well, but avoid frustration and anger when they under-perform or fail to live up to quality standards.
- If you have had a traumatic past, talk it out with someone you can confide in instead of brewing a temper.
- It is essential to give yourself some ‘me’ time, in order to derive the little pleasures of life.
- The next time you get angry at a stranger, smile at him or her. Not only will this disarm the offender, but also help you put some perspective into the situation.
- The age-old remedy of counting till 10 isn’t such a bad idea. Stop, think, regain your calm and composure before losing your cool. At the cost of sounding like a cliché, develop a positive outlook towards situations and people and you shall never complain of anger ruining your day again.
Anger management is all about not giving in to a violent mood or act. One polite act at a time, with a smile, and you will do just fine!
*Image courtesy: © Thinkstock photos/ Getty Images
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