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Malti Bhojwani - Life Coach -

Malti Bhojwani is the founder of Multi Coaching International, a Professional Certified Life Coach, (ICF) NLP practitioner (Neuro Linguistic Programming) and an author. She has been involved in personal development and transformation for over 12 years.

Her clients, who range from executives, businessmen and women, housewives, life coaches, artists, teenagers and corporate groups internationally have experienced weight loss, higher income, new business ventures and the ability to cultivate healthy relationships. Many have also overcome phobias, reignited lost passions, found partners and replaced... more

http://www.multi-coaching.com/

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I am working and married. I tried to meet all expectations of my MIL mother in law and 2 SILs sister in laws including cooking, household, expensive gifts and monetary aid to MIL. But MIL and SILs are extremely bullish, manipulating, dominating, self-boasting. Shouting and fighting like a menace is daily affair for them whether in public or outsider presence. They misbehaved and criticized me in every way possible. I am passive person who don’t know to fight or shout. When my husband opposes and confronts them, all they do is manipulations, false allegations and LIES. Especially my MIL daringly LIES about everything which could prove her fault. If counter, argue, they immediately start shouting throwing false allegations, manipulations and deny my complaints by LYING that they never did it. One SIL lives in my city so MIL keeps visiting and plans our meetings to start fights to force new false allegations. MIL has no relations with her own in-laws and SILs don’t respect their in-laws.

By: Anonymous 23 Jan, 2013

Dear DIL,

I can\'t really advise you. As a coach, I work with people who have goals and want to work towards them despite the obstacles and besides in human relationships, there is ALWAYS more than one side and all sides are just opinions and not facts.
It depends on your point of view.

All I can help you with is your own attitude. Reclaim your own dignity. Live with your values in mind and have a good chat with your husband coming from what you experience and feel and not from accusing them either.

I don\'t believe that people are bad. Your MIL and SILs are just behaving in the way they know best...
Focus on the areas of your life where you can be loving and add value to the lives of others instead of talking or complaining about them.

When we focus on the problem or negativity, we only magnify it. Find endearing qualities about these 3 ladies everyday and just notice them for yourselves.

Your husband is made from the same DNA and so will your kids, hating or being defensive, accusatory of it will not serve you. You are married to it. If unbearable and they are really evil, then leave, if you choose to stay because of your husband, then accept them and make the most of your situation.

What does living with your MIL give you? There must be some pay-offs of you would not be there. If nothing else, there may be a lot for you to learn about yourself, your insecurities and this may be the opportunity for you to grow into your own strong woman!